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FOFO vs JOMO
Dec 03, 2025, 04:00 IST
FOFO is the fear of finding out what needs attention; JOMO or the joy of missing out refers to intentional, calm filtering. Knowing the difference can change how you think, decide and age, says neuroscientist Kumaar Bagrodia
In health, relationships, performance, and long-term well-being, the information we avoid often shapes our trajectory more than the information we seek. FOFO: Fear of Finding Out has become a subconscious yet one of the most influential behavioural forces of modern life. Whether it’s sidestepping conversations about stress, ignoring financial uncertainty, or avoiding insights into sleep, attention, addiction, brain function or mental health, FOFO may feel protective in the moment but often works against us over time.
What FOFO does inside the brain’s networks
Avoidance is not passive. When someone senses that important information waits for them, especially if it demands change or responsibility, the brain shifts into a defensive state. Threat-monitoring networks light up, attention narrows, and thinking feels heavier or less flexible. Mental bandwidth sits locked in anticipation rather than clarity. Energy drops. Sleep falters. Emotional balance is negatively affected. Even simple decisions feel harder than they should. The longer a person sits in uncertainty, the more the brain cycles through possibilities without reaching any conclusion.
This matters for long-term brain health. A nervous system that spends too much time in subtle alert mode has fewer resources left for creativity, resilience, learning and recovery, all of which support healthy ageing.
A brain-first longevity approach treats information as a prevention tool. It asks people to notice early signals: slower recovery after stress, concentration that slips after lunch, irritations that feel sharper than usual, or tasks that require more effort than they once did. These micro-shifts often appear months or years before symptoms or decline.
Complete ignorance may feel peaceful, but it removes the ability to correct course.
What if someone completely disconnects from information?
Many assume that if they step away from information, unsubscribe, ignore, distract themselves, the uncertainty disappears. But even without checking, the brain keeps running silent background loops:
“Did my manager mean something in that meeting?”
“What if my partner is upset and not saying it?”
The mind keeps scanning for threat even when the phone is off or the inbox is ignored. Avoidance removes the notification; it does not remove the worry. The “not knowing” becomes its own ongoing task, quiet, invisible, and effortful.
JOMO — joy of missing out — is often portrayed as opting out or unplugging. But true JOMO isn’t about escape or indifference. Authentic JOMO reflects a very different neural and behavioural pattern:
n Awareness without urgency
n Clarity about what deserves attention
n Reduced reactivity to external noise.
n Confidence in chosen priorities
Here, brain networks operate with less interference and more coherence. Energy is directed toward meaningful action, rest, connection, or growth, not toward scanning for imagined threats. People experiencing real JOMO aren’t avoiding information; they’re curating it.
FOFO and JOMO are not opposites
FOFO looks like avoiding a health check because you’re scared of the report.
JOMO looks like choosing not to scroll through 10 wellness influencers and instead following health advice from an expert you trust.
FOFO is driven by fear, uncertainty, and anticipated discomfort. It pulls the brain toward vigilance, withdrawal, and hesitation.
JOMO is driven by intentionality, boundaries, and internal alignment. It supports clearer thinking, calmer nervous system states, and better long-term choices.
FOFO postpones action.
JOMO enables it.
FOFO drains the brain.
JOMO restores it.
And although both can look like “not checking,” the inner experience and long-term consequence to the individual, is different.
Longevity depends on facing what we don’t want to know
A brain that repeatedly avoids clarity tends to become less adaptable over time. Decisions get delayed, small issues become bigger ones, and internal stress builds.
This is why brain focused wellbeing increasingly encourages early awareness regular self-reflection, check ins, and objective understanding of cognitive performance, emotional patterns, sleep quality, stress load, and lifestyle effects. Subjective perception alone is unreliable; the brain can feel “fine” even when struggling. Objective perspectives whether through conversations, structured reflection, tracking changes, or validated tools that illuminate mental effort, stress patterns, or network efficiency, replace uncertainty with agency.
The road to clarity
Do this instead:
n Seek clarity early especially around stress, energy, attention, and mental wellbeing.
n Break unknowns into manageable steps.
n Let information guide action rather than emotion.
n Practise selective attention, protect cognitive space.
n Choose decisions that benefit your future self.
Avoid this:
n Postponing check ins about wellbeing, performance, or relationships.
n Mistaking silence for stability.
n Calling avoidance “peace.”
n Letting unanswered questions run in the background.
n Believing intuition alone replaces information.
The author is the founder of NeuroLeap and HALE Healthy Ageing Longevity Enhancement. His work focuses on brain-first longevity and the intersection of neuroscience with everyday health
What FOFO does inside the brain’s networks
Avoidance is not passive. When someone senses that important information waits for them, especially if it demands change or responsibility, the brain shifts into a defensive state. Threat-monitoring networks light up, attention narrows, and thinking feels heavier or less flexible. Mental bandwidth sits locked in anticipation rather than clarity. Energy drops. Sleep falters. Emotional balance is negatively affected. Even simple decisions feel harder than they should. The longer a person sits in uncertainty, the more the brain cycles through possibilities without reaching any conclusion.
This matters for long-term brain health. A nervous system that spends too much time in subtle alert mode has fewer resources left for creativity, resilience, learning and recovery, all of which support healthy ageing.
A brain-first longevity approach treats information as a prevention tool. It asks people to notice early signals: slower recovery after stress, concentration that slips after lunch, irritations that feel sharper than usual, or tasks that require more effort than they once did. These micro-shifts often appear months or years before symptoms or decline.
Complete ignorance may feel peaceful, but it removes the ability to correct course.
What if someone completely disconnects from information?
Many assume that if they step away from information, unsubscribe, ignore, distract themselves, the uncertainty disappears. But even without checking, the brain keeps running silent background loops:
“Did my manager mean something in that meeting?”
“What if my partner is upset and not saying it?”
The mind keeps scanning for threat even when the phone is off or the inbox is ignored. Avoidance removes the notification; it does not remove the worry. The “not knowing” becomes its own ongoing task, quiet, invisible, and effortful.
JOMO — joy of missing out — is often portrayed as opting out or unplugging. But true JOMO isn’t about escape or indifference. Authentic JOMO reflects a very different neural and behavioural pattern:
n Awareness without urgency
n Clarity about what deserves attention
n Reduced reactivity to external noise.
n Confidence in chosen priorities
Here, brain networks operate with less interference and more coherence. Energy is directed toward meaningful action, rest, connection, or growth, not toward scanning for imagined threats. People experiencing real JOMO aren’t avoiding information; they’re curating it.
FOFO and JOMO are not opposites
FOFO looks like avoiding a health check because you’re scared of the report.
JOMO looks like choosing not to scroll through 10 wellness influencers and instead following health advice from an expert you trust.
FOFO is driven by fear, uncertainty, and anticipated discomfort. It pulls the brain toward vigilance, withdrawal, and hesitation.
JOMO is driven by intentionality, boundaries, and internal alignment. It supports clearer thinking, calmer nervous system states, and better long-term choices.
FOFO postpones action.
JOMO enables it.
FOFO drains the brain.
JOMO restores it.
And although both can look like “not checking,” the inner experience and long-term consequence to the individual, is different.
Longevity depends on facing what we don’t want to know
A brain that repeatedly avoids clarity tends to become less adaptable over time. Decisions get delayed, small issues become bigger ones, and internal stress builds.
This is why brain focused wellbeing increasingly encourages early awareness regular self-reflection, check ins, and objective understanding of cognitive performance, emotional patterns, sleep quality, stress load, and lifestyle effects. Subjective perception alone is unreliable; the brain can feel “fine” even when struggling. Objective perspectives whether through conversations, structured reflection, tracking changes, or validated tools that illuminate mental effort, stress patterns, or network efficiency, replace uncertainty with agency.
The road to clarity
Do this instead:
n Seek clarity early especially around stress, energy, attention, and mental wellbeing.
n Break unknowns into manageable steps.
n Let information guide action rather than emotion.
n Practise selective attention, protect cognitive space.
n Choose decisions that benefit your future self.
Avoid this:
n Postponing check ins about wellbeing, performance, or relationships.
n Mistaking silence for stability.
n Calling avoidance “peace.”
n Letting unanswered questions run in the background.
n Believing intuition alone replaces information.
The author is the founder of NeuroLeap and HALE Healthy Ageing Longevity Enhancement. His work focuses on brain-first longevity and the intersection of neuroscience with everyday health
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